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Week of March 13, 2006

You can take "The Peacemaker," "Deep Impact," and "The Tuxedo." We'll take "Gladiator," "American Beauty" and anything else that didn't suck.

Emilio's 17

Yeah, like he needed all that overpriced crap anyway...

This lawsuit's going to make 'House Party' look like 'House Party Two!'

I told you... don't call me SENIOR!!

Maybe this is all a bad dream too?

Thanks Sharon, but I think I'll wait until this one comes out on DVD (so I can freeze frame of course)

There is absolutely, positively no nepotism in Hollywood. None.

You're good, baby, I'll give you that... but me? I'm magic.

This band will go down like a lead balloon

Well, Goodbye there Children...

They can't sell the Capitol Records building! What will be left to destroy in the next crappy 'end of the world' movie?

Same old Courtney - still sponging off Kurt

Panic on the streets of Austin

You're a fat, Botox faced, wig-wearing ninny! Oh yeah? Well your band has a dirty H addict as a lead singer!

Black Sabbath, Blondie, Miles Davis, The Sex Pistols, Lynyrd Skynyrd Enter Rock Hall



01 THE BREAK-UP $39.17
$12759/av

02 X-MEN: THE LAST STAND $34.02
$9159/av

03 OVER THE HEDGE $20.65
$5170/avg

04 THE DAVINCI CODE $18.61
$4953/avg

05 MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III $4.68
$1756/avg

06 POSEIDON $3.49
$1283/avg

07 RV $3.20
$1469/avg

08 SEE NO EVIL $2.04
$1607/avg

09 AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH $1.36
$17615/avg

10 JUST MY LUCK $855K
$892/avg









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UNDEREXPOSED

By Kendra Hibbert

By way of introduction to this first series of film reviews, I'll explain who I am and what this space is intended for. I have a job (albeit a non-paying one) as a critic for a local free newspaper and as such, I get invited to watch screenings of various movies playing. Now, normally a critic for a big newspaper would get to see SPIDER-MAN five weeks before the rest of the world or at least MASTER OF DISGUISE the night before it opens, but because the paper I'm associated with is too small for most PR guys to notice, the majority of the movies I see are usually foreign or made with $20 and a circa-1988 video camera.

However sometimes, very rarely, there are films I see that deserve more attention than they get in mainstream press. This space is intended to help you, the audience, find those cheaply made, subtitled works of art without having to go through all the cheaply made, subtitled pieces of crap.

This week: DEVDAS, HOME MOVIE and DOGTOWN AND Z-BOYS

DEVDAS

A few years ago, I had a Hindi roommate who used to invite her friend over every Sunday afternoon to watch Bollywood musicals on the local multi-cultural channel. They'd sit on the couch and laugh their asses off at the women singing on screen who'd wag their finger in the leading man's face, roll their eyes and smile like a maniac while they danced around. I also found these movies funny but always assumed it was because, not knowing Hindi, I didn't understand the nuances of this couple's relationship, nor the traditions and culture that these musicals were coming from. But it turns out I was wrong. As my roommate explained to me, most of these pictures (called 'masala films') are worse than the cheese that Hollywood puts out. They're like the Indian equivalent of Godzilla or Roger Corman, melodramatic movies with little in the way of plot or characters, made strictly for family fun. Feeling a little less racist, I soon joined their Sunday afternoon ritual, giggling on the couch along with them (I realize the mental picture of three young nubile girls giggling on the couch has just sparked an unintended reaction in half the male audience reading this. That's okay. Go do what you have to do and I'll be here when you get back.)

It was, therefore, with some trepidation that I began watching DEVDAS. To be honest I knew nothing about what I was going to see (I'd like to say I planned it that way to avoid any preconceived ideas about the film, but actually, I was just lazy). I quickly realized what I was in for when ads for other Bollywood musicals started showing before the film. The thought of sneaking out before it started entered my mind, but I had never walked out on a movie before and, this being a free one, I figured at the very least, I'd be able to doze off if things got really bad.

I quickly realized my nap idea was totally unfeasible 1) because the music was blaring too loud and 2) it was a freaking GREAT movie!! Think back to the first time you watched a carefully planned, brilliantly orchestrated kung-fu film from Jackie Chan or Jet Li and you'll get the idea, except in DEVDAS, they don't beat the crap out of each other when they dance. To the macho action film aficionados out there who see this as a drawback, don't go see this movie - it's a love story and you'll probably get cooties from watching it. Rent something Steven Seagal-related instead.

Those who enjoyed CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON for more than the fight scenes and MOULIN ROUGE! for more than Ewan McGregor, who therefore don't mind sitting through a movie with both subtitles and singing, this is a film that will entertain you from start to finish. It's got an epic love story of two separated lovers forbidden to see each other, huge colorful sets and an ending that has one of the most moving, tragic death scenes I've ever seen. Throw in the exotic locale and actors that are kinda cute and you've got a recipe for 3 hours of pure enjoyment.

It is three hours, though. Put enough money in the parking meter to cover it and come in prepared. I didn't mind the length, but when I was leaving there were a couple bitter, old film reviewers complaining about the time. What do they know? They lost touch with what's really entertaining years ago. Listen to me. I know what you like and you will like DEVDAS.

HOME MOVIE

Chris Smith, the director behind AMERICAN MOVIE, brings you another documentary full of people you can laugh at. This time he visits five unusual homes of five even more unusual owners - Ben Skora, an inventor in Chicago who turned his suburban home into a high-tech masterpiece (not really a modern high-tech masterpiece, more of a 60s high-tech masterpiece, full of the kind of switches and robots you'd see in the original STAR TREK series); the Pedens, a soft-spoken couple who took over an abandoned missile base in Kansas, 'transformed the energy' and constructed a new-age paradise; Linda Beech, a woman who must've made a wack-load of cash as a cult actress in Japan to be able to afford the massive tree-house she built in the middle of a Hawaiian rain-forest; Bill Tregle, the Cajun equivalent of the Crocodile Hunter, who lives in a huge houseboat in the middle of a lake; and Bob Walker and Francis Mooney, an anti-social couple who spent $10,000 completely transforming their house to make it awkward for humans to live in but comfortable for their cats.

The beauty of this documentary is that Chris Smith truly loves his subjects, even if he does sometimes use them as punch-lines. Possibly the best moment in the film comes when Ben Skora, demonstrating the handiness of his motorized chair, knocks a huge vase of flowers onto the floor (trust me, it's funny on screen), then sheepishly tries to pretend it's no big deal.

HOME MOVIE is different than AMERICAN MOVIE, in that the attention is split up between five different stories rather than just one. Because Chris Smith doesn't spend as much time with these people, we never really get to know them as well as Mark and Mike from the earlier film. Plus, there are times when the movie jumps from home to home seemingly without cause and, as a result, a comfortable flow is never properly established. But it's fun to watch and at 67 minutes it makes a good piece of light entertainment.

As an added bonus, HOME MOVIE is touring with HEAVY METAL PARKING LOT - the original masterpiece from 1986 in which a couple guys interviewed the various inhabitants hanging out in the parking lot before a Judas Priest concert. It's definitely a fun short film to see, if for no other reason than to laugh at the 80s rocker slang and the mullet-heads who looked up to (now openly gay, former-Priest front-man) Rob Halford, as a ladies man.

DOGTOWN AND Z-BOYS

I was originally going to talk about TADPOLE here but then I read Michael Dequina's excellent review of said movie in Film Flam Flummox and realized anything I wrote would pale in comparison and say pretty much the exact same stuff. Instead, I decided to review DOGTOWN AND Z-BOYS, a documentary that's been out for a little while and, knowing the usual theatre time dedicated to this genre, is probably not showing anymore on the big screen.

However, if it is playing in a theatre near you or if, a couple months down the road, you happen to see it in your local video store, I highly recommend watching this film about the early days of skateboarding. Before there was Tony Hawk or vert ramps, the Zephyr team (Z-boys for short) - a band of punk kids from Venice, California - were draining out pools abandoned during the '76-'77 drought and riding them in homemade skateboards at a time when the rest of the world thought the sport had gone the way of yo-yos and hula-hoops.

As the story goes, when the filmmakers heard Hollywood was planning on doing a movie based on the Z-boys, they decided to put together this documentary before the material got bastardized by some studio executive. As a way to make this film different than the future feature, they chose to spend most of this film exploring the punk attitude of the Venice surf/skateboarding community in the 70s. The first half focuses mostly on describing the atmosphere at the time - surfers who were more like the Hell's Angels than the pretty boys of beaches further down the coast, and kids who took up skateboarding because the tide went out at 11am. Most of the old footage was taken by Craig Stecyk, one of the writers on the film who also penned the series of articles published in Skateboarder magazine that put the Z-boys on the map and became one of the biggest influences on the skate industry today.

From Sean Penn's laidback narration to the sight of these kids skating in their bare feet, this film oozes style from every one of its celluloid pores. It's a must-see for anyone who's ever skated yet interesting and easy enough to follow that it'll still entertain those who couldn't care less about the sport. The hardcore spirit and philosophy of the Zephyr team still shows through in the old footage. With any luck, it'll have the same effect on young skaters today as it did in the 70s, when it inspired a generation to pick up a board and start practicing tricks in the alleyways.

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Addicted to Bad
by Patrick Keller

International Intrigue
by Alison Veneto

Nocturnal Admissions
by D.K. Holm

Strange Impersonation
by Kim Morgan

Trailer Park
by Christopher Stipp




New DVD Releases
for April 11, 2006

DVD Diatribe
by D.K. Holm

DVD Late Show
by Christopher Mills




Preachin' from the Longbox
by Britt Schramm

Should It Be a Movie?
by Marc Mason

New Comic Book Releases
for April 12, 2006, 2006




New CD Releases
for April 11, 2006

Music for the Masses
by M.C. Bell




TV Recommendations
Boob toob picks of the week by Chris Ryall

Kentucky Fried Rasslin'
by Scott Bowden

TV Pilot Review Archives
by Chris Ryall



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