How to ruin your life: Step One [Archive]

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Robbo_the_Hood

01-25-2006, 08:41 PM

Travel across the country with your ex-girlfriend, and act like you're still dating in front of her mom. Then, don't get upset when you know the other person on the phone is the "other guy."

marksiwel

01-25-2006, 09:32 PM

tell us more...like...why would you do such a thing!?! How far did you travel?

psychofiend

01-25-2006, 10:48 PM

tell us more...like...why would you do such a thing!?! How far did you travel?
I think it's just a situation he made up. No one is stupid enough to put themselves into that situation.

By-tor

01-25-2006, 11:59 PM

Damn, Robbo. I'd almost rather sleep in my car than have to share my apartment, or anything else(especially time) with someone... aww hell, man, I'm just sorry for your luck. Hope this crap gets over with ASAP for you.

Graceful17

01-26-2006, 12:43 AM

riiiiiiite... if your not over your girl yet, probably best to give her and.. the guy on the other end of the phone some space until your fully ready to deal. Going on a long trip and pretending to still be together... not good! whew

Razorback

01-26-2006, 02:32 AM

Travel across the country with your ex-girlfriend, and act like you're still dating in front of her mom. Then, don't get upset when you know the other person on the phone is the "other guy."

Rule One of Saving Yourself from Ruining Your Life:

Stop being a nice guy, dipshit. You will need no more rules if you follow this one.

TLS

01-26-2006, 11:42 AM

Next time he calls you should take the phone from her and yell at 'the other guy.' Say something like "Stop calling here Dick!" and hang up. She'll think you never had it in you plus she'll also think about it some more and think that you really do like her, then she'll be all like 'I want you back,' and then you get the pleasure of throwing it back in her face and be like 'you suck cheater'...
but after all said and done you will have the satifaction of letting out your anger and knowing she wants you back and can't have you. Switches the situation to being your choice, which makes it feel better. Though in a perfect world, that senario just may work.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 12:18 PM

For those who may have forgotten, and a newbie who doesn't know their fuckin' place in my fuckin' thread, I thought everything was documented here (http://moviepoopshoot.com/forums/showthread.php?t=5545). Considering everything that went down three weeks ago, I think I'm doing fairly well.

Aside from that,
Next time he calls you should take the phone from her and yell at 'the other guy.' Say something like "Stop calling here Dick!" and hang up. She'll think you never had it in you plus she'll also think about it some more and think that you really do like her, then she'll be all like 'I want you back,' and then you get the pleasure of throwing it back in her face and be like 'you suck cheater'...
but after all said and done you will have the satifaction of letting out your anger and knowing she wants you back and can't have you. Switches the situation to being your choice, which makes it feel better. Though in a perfect world, that senario just may work.
It's not so much about getting her back, nor wanting her to suffer. I'm more upset that she won't own up to her actions. It hurts more that she thinks I'm an idiot. However, I'm suddenly realizing that I'm dealing with a pathological liar. Seriously. After I found this stuff out a lot of things came unraveled, and I realized she's lied about everything from her age to her numerous degrees. I'm also realizing she probably lied about me going into unexplored territory, to put it mildly (about which I honestly don't care). The part I care about is that when the evidence doesn't add up, she still believes her own lies.

FanGirl

01-26-2006, 01:02 PM

So you were dating a politican?

phit_demon

01-26-2006, 01:24 PM

For those who may have forgotten, and a newbie who doesn't know their fuckin' place in my fuckin' thread, I thought everything was documented
I empathise with your shitty situation dude, I posted a link to that thread this morning, but then deleted it. I didn't want to overstep my boundaries or whatever. :o
By the sounds of it, you're better off without her.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 01:34 PM

I empathise with your shitty situation dude, I posted a link to that thread this morning, but then deleted it. I didn't want to overstep my boundaries or whatever. :o
By the sounds of it, you're better off without her.Dude, no worries. I would have felt better had someone linked it for the idiot newbie's sake. Then again, I certainly don't mind telling off a newb at all.

Dave

01-26-2006, 02:05 PM

Well how long until your lease is up? and how much would it cost you to break it early? I think you need to get out of that house man.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 02:07 PM

September. I have to make a few strategic investments before I do anything just yet. But I'm working on it.

TLS

01-26-2006, 02:45 PM

You seem like a real sweet guy to go along on the trip and consider her mom's feelings despite all that's happened. Sounds like you're the type of person who would feel better if you could help your ex, though being that she's a pathological liar, she may have deeper issues that she needs to deal with. In this case a professional may be better suited to handle this.

You could help her by convincing her she needs help, though most people don't take kindly to those who imply they are crazy. Might be best for you to move on and mind your own business and pray she finds the help she needs. People like her are usually oblivious to the fact they have a problem, so I hope she realizes it before she makes too many more mistakes.

jjcourtright

01-26-2006, 03:29 PM

I'm also realizing she probably lied about me going into unexplored territory What, like the back of a Volkswagen?

Dave

01-26-2006, 03:30 PM

No silly. Like the Dark Side of the Moon.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 03:33 PM

Whoa, whoa, whoa!!! We're not talking about that. I was just trying to politely say that she told me I was her first. Jesus, you people.

jjcourtright

01-26-2006, 03:38 PM

My bad, I just assumed that she was old enough that B was the more obvious choice.

Not to say that after a certain age B has to come up...just that after a certain age A has more than likely already come up...

Zens7s

01-26-2006, 05:14 PM

I think it would be scary to find someone who was still a virgin in their twenties. It's like admitting that no one ever wanted them before, and who wants to be with that person. ;) Obviously I am kidding. I am sure someone wants a virgin, but I am just not one of them.

At any rate, after you called last night I inadvertantly had to tell the story to the guys at dinner...because they overheard me talking. They were so pissed for you. So certain observations from the Fort Worth Consortium on Robbos Love Problem:

A) I was told by the boyfriend-unit that if I ever pulled that shit with him he was dumping me, taking one piece of all my matching bra and panty sets and donating them to Salvation Army, and taking custody of Skinny Vinny the Italian Kitty (my cat) as punishment. Also he would have told me to "call the new dude and take him to visit mom." I think I will avoid breaking up with him, because cats and underware are expensive.

B) The guys agreed with TLS above. She is testing how far the bounds of Mr. Nice Guy will go and girls have no respect for a push over. You should tell her flat out that when you are around you don't want to speak to her, look at her, and will generally pretend she is dead until you can find more suitible living arrangements. Sadly, she may like it because some girls think the whole drama thing is really sexy and that's half the reason they added another guy into the picture. I am not one of those girls, but I know those girls.

C) The guys suggest you do the following to get over her mentally, so you don't care what she does. What does she do that REALLY annoyed you? The simple stuff like clog up the shower drain with her hair would even work. Then every time you find yourself romanticizing the "way it was" [and sighing] think of that gross obnoxious thing, coupled with a mental picture of her looking like totally ass...preferably in her fat pants on PMS week and unshowered.
Then apparently you should picture your fantasy hot "next" woman who won't do this thing, looks amazing, and be happy that you can go out and legally pursue a better one. It's the grass is greener theory, applied for positive gain.

I love you to death sweetie, but it's time to grow a pair on this one. No matter how much you romanticize the way it was, in truth it wasn't that great...reality never is. She may be a pathological liar, but she is also a pathological turd and I may have to kick some butt. Has Julia gotten a hold of her yet?

BAMSS04

01-26-2006, 05:15 PM

Robbo,

Man that sucks. Just ask her not to talk to him in front of you. I mean you are doing her a favor, she can do you one. If not then fuck her( not literally :)), just bust the whole thing out in front of her mom and dad. I mean its not like you have anything to be ashamed of, or anything to lose.

Good luck man, really. You deserve a great women, from what I can see. I hope after you let this one go, you find her.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 05:53 PM

Again, I'm not so much upset that it was the other guy. What I am upset about is that she won't admit it's the other guy. She didn't tell him I would be in Cali with her, and so the conversation changed from "we are" doing stuff to "I am" doing stuff.

I don't care that it's the other guy. I'm upset that she lies to me and tells me it's someone else, when I know damn well who it is. It pisses me off that she thinks I'm stupid. Either that, or she believes her own lies, and dating or not, I can't live with a pathological liar.

What a time to have car trouble.

It sounds like she's playing both sides, and this guy has been upset with me for as long as she and I were dating because I asked her out first. I feel bad that he's built her up so highly and things are obviously going to end poorly for him. As for me, I'm tired of being treated like an idiot.

freetoaster

01-26-2006, 06:10 PM

We're just too old for that shit. Do you still love her?

Dave

01-26-2006, 06:12 PM

You should bring a barskank home and have sex with her ontop of something of your ex's, like her favorite coat or spank her with you're ex's shower back scrub brush or something like that.

As i say this, i know it's hard to just "bring the skank" home just after a breakup, but i know you got it in ya. so if the opertunity arrises, that's my advice.

Zens7s

01-26-2006, 06:13 PM

Yep, time for some "make myself feel better" skank sex! Good call Dave.

Even better you can not feel guilty for forgetting to call her the next day.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-26-2006, 06:17 PM

We're just too old for that shit. Do you still love her?Nope, but I tell ya, this is going to set me back a ways as far as emmotional maturity is concerned.

FanGirl

01-26-2006, 06:19 PM

"emmotional maturity" - overrated

Sheriff

01-26-2006, 06:53 PM

Ugh, I feel for you man. I think you are in the better position than this other douche, he is dating a girl who lies, lives with another man, and just went on an extended trip with him. Fuck him, it probably is a great foundation for thier relationship and they deserve each other (excuse me if I infered to much). Hopefully you can come out of this without it tainting you, you seem cool for not wanting to be vengeful.

Also, I must not be 'emmotional mature' because when Zens wrote underware all I could think of was underwear made of tupperware. *giggles like a 6 year old*

01-26-2006, 07:08 PM

This girl isn't named 'Tasha', by any chance, is she?

freetoaster

01-26-2006, 07:16 PM

Robbo, hang tough. You might be suprised at what you learn about yourself.
It may not be all bad, regardless off how she acts.

karmattack

01-26-2006, 07:22 PM

After going through what I went through with Renee, and how many times I went through it, I realized that not everybody deserves the Mr. Nice Guy. That's coming from a guy who is friends with every single other ex-girlfriend he's had. But I can only have my compassion man-handled and betrayed so many times by one person, and I think Renee was one of those girls Zens and TLS were talking about. She was a pathological liar too, and slept around, and mostly helped me feel like it was my fault. My last words to her after she tried to ask me yet again to be her friend were "If you can remember everything you've done to me and still think I owe it to you to be your friend, you need to wake up and smell the burning bridge."

I'm still getting over some of the things from that relationship. But here's the key: pain is what you feel when weakness is leaving the body, and a struggle is another opportunity to do the right thing. Now drop and give me 20! Like a circus seal!!

By-tor

01-26-2006, 07:54 PM

My God, I am so sorry you guys have had to go through this kinda shit. As I sit here my wife is on another comp looking at a resort called "Las Brisas", in Acapulco, for our 25th in May. I may be the luckiest MF on this board when it comes to relationships. Shit, I've only really had one. If I hand out any advice that doesn't hold water, please tell me to fuck off. I wish all of you the kind of luck I've had when it comes to finding the significant other.

Razorback

01-28-2006, 02:03 AM

Psyche

01-28-2006, 02:39 AM

I have discovered something far worse than a virgin in her 20s... (not that I find anything wrong with being a virgin into your 20s or 30s, just that it can be dangerous to take their virginity) a woman in her late 30s who wants a baby and a husband... and NOW!

you need to find one of those elusive 20 somethings who doesn't want a marriage or a kid but wouldn't mind a long lasting romantic attachment =p

though those might be rare. i still get odd comments from people who are shocked i'm almost 23 and don't have 4 kids. i ran into a chick i went to high school with (she was pregnant our senior year) first thing she asked "do you have any kids?" and ran away when i said no.

ozchick

01-28-2006, 07:33 AM

you need to find one of those elusive 20 somethings who doesn't want a marriage or a kid but wouldn't mind a long lasting romantic attachment =p

I'm one of those elusive 20 somethings.

though those might be rare. i still get odd comments from people who are shocked i'm almost 23 and don't have 4 kids. i ran into a chick i went to high school with (she was pregnant our senior year) first thing she asked "do you have any kids?" and ran away when i said no.

I hear ya. I have no plans to ever have kids. I'm just not a kiddy person. For some reason people just wont accept this. If I have to hear one more person tell me I'll change my mind when I meet the right guy I will scream.

FanGirl

01-28-2006, 01:32 PM

I hear you oz. I say the same thing. Although, the other day holding my friend's newborn this little voice in th back of my head went "I can't wait to have one" and then the rest of my brain screamed "what the hell was that? where did that thought come from?" Stupid biological clock must have twinged. I hit snooze for a few more years. I don't think you'll change your mind, but be warned your biological clock may betray you. I thought I had disconnected mine years ago. Damn thing must have repaired itself.

Psyche

01-28-2006, 04:09 PM

I'm one of those elusive 20 somethings.

I hear ya. I have no plans to ever have kids. I'm just not a kiddy person. For some reason people just wont accept this. If I have to hear one more person tell me I'll change my mind when I meet the right guy I will scream.

lol. i am one of those elusive 20 year olds too. and i want kids just hell, i want to live life first

BAMSS04

01-28-2006, 10:40 PM

Not a girl, but have no real option for kids. I guess I would like one kid, maybe, but then at other times I don't. I am in no real hurry for one at any rate.

Right now, I just have to focus on finding a women. It has been a long time since I have physically met a good one, too long. It has been almost two years since my last relationship, meaning almost 2 years of no......well, you know :). Dry spell has entered an all-time record length.

Graceful17

01-29-2006, 12:00 AM

I don't know how half the girls my age are already planning their families and naming their future children. Hell i would like to go to college and graduate before i even consider having a kid, let alone more then one.

phit_demon

01-29-2006, 12:59 AM

meaning almost 2 years of no......well, you know :). Dry spell has entered an all-time record length.
http://www.vvaughn.com/the%20actor/images/swingers43.jpg
Listen, it's hard, I know. I've been there myself. Not for two years or anything, but I've been there.;)

Graceful17

01-29-2006, 01:01 AM

sex withdrawal... *sigh*

Psyche

01-29-2006, 01:25 AM

BAMSS04

01-29-2006, 01:40 AM

Graceful17

01-29-2006, 01:46 AM

I have never had a one night stand, and i don't think i ever will. Im not judging anybody either... just also not for me.

Psyche

01-29-2006, 02:24 AM

I'm not into promiscuous sex. Never have been. I have had one, one-night-stand in my life. That was because I was drunk as a skunk, and I regretted it the moment after I did it. I have nothing against people who do it, but its just never been for me.

i never said anything about promiscuous sex/one night stands now did i? there are other situations besides relationships and promiscuous sex

karmattack

01-29-2006, 02:14 PM

I'm really not into going to community centers and paying the elderly for sex. I'm not judging people who do though.

JamesW

01-29-2006, 02:30 PM

I'm really not into going to community centers and paying the elderly for sex. I'm not judging people who do though.

That's odd, they always pay ME.

karmattack

01-29-2006, 02:46 PM

Lucky!

So, I take it the 'W' stands for Walker?

By-tor

01-29-2006, 02:50 PM

I'm really not into going to community centers and paying the elderly for sex. I'm not judging people who do though.Community centers? Hell, karma, the bus stops are a much better place to pick up them hot octogenarians.

Psyche

01-29-2006, 03:55 PM

I'm really not into going to community centers and paying the elderly for sex. I'm not judging people who do though.

you're getting ripped off. they're supposed to pay you

FanGirl

01-29-2006, 04:32 PM

Damn it! The erase button on my mental VCR isn't working. Make it stop! Make it stop!

Psyche

01-29-2006, 04:40 PM

Damn it! The erase button on my mental VCR isn't working. Make it stop! Make it stop!

imagine..brad pitt naked gogogogogogo@!#

Mr Mysterio

01-29-2006, 08:48 PM

Your mental VCR? What, it likes to sit there watching... with it's evil red lights, hiding the remote control of slavery as it tries to eat and shred your hands when you insert a tape....

Zens7s

01-29-2006, 09:08 PM

I hear ya. I have no plans to ever have kids. I'm just not a kiddy person. For some reason people just wont accept this. If I have to hear one more person tell me I'll change my mind when I meet the right guy I will scream.One of my best friends is now in her fourties, has a wonderful partner, and has never had kids. She has often talked about how she just never really felt the motherly instinct kick in. However, she has also often been frustrated about how society in general just doesn't understand a woman who doesn't want kids (aside from those who just claim not too)...but they are totally understanding of men who don't. It's funny you said "you'll change your mind" because that's exactly the phrase that makes her say her trademark shut up phrase..."since we are talking about my personal reproductive organs, lets talk about yours. How are your ovaries doing?" ;)

For obvious reasons I have had to think a lot about whether or not I want children. When I was married my husband was very upset because he wanted kids and I truly didn't...at least with him. The other night my boyfriend asked me what I wanted and my opinion has changed. I may want kids someday...but I certainly don't think my life will be any less complete if I don't have them.

By-tor

01-29-2006, 11:01 PM

I don't have any problem with people not wanting to have kids. First, they are expensive. But, the ups far outweigh the downs. I think there are just alot of great things that the childless miss out on. I've just been freakin' blessed with my two. Watching them grow up has been the best part of my life.

ozchick

01-29-2006, 11:24 PM

I certainly don't think my life will be any less complete if I don't have them.

This is it in a nutshell. I don't know why so many people (in particular my mother) can't understand this.

Graceful17

01-29-2006, 11:36 PM

This is it in a nutshell. I don't know why so many people (in particular my mother) can't understand this.
Sort of like why they just can't understand why you wouldn't want to have children. Its a vicious cycle. Its like trying to kill a dead horse... just leave it to not understanding.

Matthew

01-30-2006, 12:43 AM

This is it in a nutshell. I don't know why so many people (in particular my mother) can't understand this.

Because your mother wants (more?) Grandkids.. Also, she sees how you have fullfilled her life, and wants the same for you! :)

ozchick

01-30-2006, 12:59 AM

My mum does want grand kids but she's managed to produce 3 daughters, 2 of which have no interest in having kids and the other who is a teacher (and therefore whilst not opposed to it 'in theory' has enough of them during the day). She (along with a whole bunch of other people in society) should be able to recognise that it's not the be all and end all of life and accept that just as it would be my decision to have kids, it's also mine to not have them. And just because I don't have kids doesn't mean my life won't be full.

Disclaimer: Should Matthew Mcconoughey ask me to bear his children, I'd make an exception :)

Zens7s

01-30-2006, 01:07 AM

Disclaimer: Should Matthew Mcconoughey ask me to bear his children, I'd make an exception :)I think it's important to use this to point out to your mother that there is always a chance. ;)

After reading your post it reminds me yet again of how blessed I was to have my parents. My mom has never, in spite of what she may secretly want for herself, ever pressured me to marry or have children. It makes my life much easier.

BAMSS04

01-30-2006, 03:58 AM

i never said anything about promiscuous sex/one night stands now did i? there are other situations besides relationships and promiscuous sex

Like What? Paying for sex? If so, then that is completely out of the question.

Am I missing something? I am pretty tired and have been all this week but I am pretty sure you can only get sex via:

Relationship
Promiscuity
Prostitution
Rape
Sodomy

The last three are out of the question, for obvious personal and moral reasons. I was assuming you were not refering to them, thus the assumption.

I have conveyed my thoughts on Promiscuity.

Leaving only one, viable alternative.

If there is a 6th way I have not heard about, by all means enlighten me. I have been wrong before. :)

kaizen_man68

01-30-2006, 08:31 AM

well, if I was dumb enough find myself playing the martyr in this "hypothetical" situation, I would have to listen to the little 'voice of dissent' in my head.

go for the mom, make a pass, when the lying daughter is preoccupied with her new beau. What the hell, the relationship is over anyways.

note: only if the Mom is hot enough to tolerate the ridicule you'll receive when everyone finds out. But if you were stupid enough to find yourself in a car with a girl that is boinking another guy instead of you, then you just might be lucky enough to get away with it. maybe

kaizen_man68

01-30-2006, 08:33 AM

Like What? Paying for sex? If so, then that is completely out of the question.

Am I missing something? I am pretty tired and have been all this week but I am pretty sure you can only get sex via:

Relationship
Promiscuity
Prostitution
Rape
Sodomy

The last three are out of the question, for obvious personal and moral reasons. I was assuming you were not refering to them, thus the assumption.

I have conveyed my thoughts on Promiscuity.

Leaving only one, viable alternative.

If there is a 6th way I have not heard about, by all means enlighten me. I have been wrong before. :)

don't forget beastilality

TLS

01-30-2006, 10:34 AM

If there is a 6th way I have not heard about, by all means enlighten me. I have been wrong before. :)

What about the booty call, AKA - F**k buddy. It doesn't really put them into the relationship category because there are no strings attached; and it's not really promiscuous because it's the same ol' reliable person.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-30-2006, 10:55 AM

Am I missing something? I am pretty tired and have been all this week but I am pretty sure you can only get sex via:

Relationship
Promiscuity
Prostitution
Rape
Sodomy

The last three are out of the question, for obvious personal and moral reasons.
You realize that by definition, sodomy refers oral sex as well as anal. Legally, it's why oral sex is a crime in some states that define sodomy as illegal.

Wasn't it Matthew that claimed to reach the unattainable goal sought by all men? He sodomized himself. :D

Psyche

01-30-2006, 01:36 PM

Psyche

01-30-2006, 01:38 PM

What about the booty call, AKA - F**k buddy. It doesn't really put them into the relationship category because there are no strings attached; and it's not really promiscuous because it's the same ol' reliable person.

exactly. that's my point. no relationship but you get what you need when you need it from the same person Lol..

You realize that by definition, sodomy refers oral sex as well as anal. Legally, it's why oral sex is a crime in some states that define sodomy as illegal.

Wasn't it Matthew that claimed to reach the unattainable goal sought by all men? He sodomized himself.

technically anything besides missionary is deemed sodom

Zens7s

01-30-2006, 02:46 PM

I think Robbo needs a Monday perscription for a break up. Play "Wish Me Well (You Can Go To Hell)" by The Bouncing Souls three times and take a shot of Jack Daniels. Then call us in the morning.

If additional stimulus is needed then add Ween's "Baby Bitch".

Matthew

01-30-2006, 03:14 PM

The definition of sodomy "Often simply refers to anal sex; however, the actual dictionary definition includes anything considered "unnatural or deviate sexual intercourse" which may include everything from oral sex to sex between partners of the same gender."

And Robbo, it seems you have to bring up my grand accomplishment once a year, usually around my birthday. Everyman wants to leave a legacy, but I am not sure I want to be remembered for that particular act.

Like I say every year, it was only a portion, and I did not finish (that would be gross).

Robbo_the_Hood

01-30-2006, 03:22 PM

By-tor

01-30-2006, 04:31 PM

BAMSS04

01-30-2006, 04:35 PM

there are situations..lets just call them friends with benefits. =p you care about each other and only really sleep with each other but aren't constrained by a relationship.

I thought you were going to say that. I think it was just a question of defintion. I consider a f**k buddy a relationship. Granted it is only based on physical needs, but I still think of it as a relationship. Anyway, the search for this "friend" has not gone any better than the other search. I would love to find me someone like that. Shit, who wouldn't.

I think it's because I live in Memphis, but no one wants just sex anymore. It is all about the ring. It is not uncommon to see people married after only 7 months of dating. Which, though there is nothing wrong with that, is not for me. I gotta get to know you first.

I have been on maybe 10 dates in the past year, and on 9 of them I heard all about how long before I would consider getting married. I'm like lady I just met you, so not for a while yet.

ILovePapaSmurf

01-30-2006, 05:04 PM

I only keep bringing it up because I'm jealous.

Don't be. I mean, I don't think women find it sexy that a guy can.... arouse himself with his mouth. I mean, don't get me wrong, I mean, yay for you, but what else is a girl supposed to do? Lay there and smile?

Robbo_the_Hood

01-30-2006, 05:14 PM

Don't be. I mean, I don't think women find it sexy that a guy can.... arouse himself with his mouth. I mean, don't get me wrong, I mean, yay for you, but what else is a girl supposed to do? Lay there and smile?If I could do that, I wouldn't have time for a woman. I'd never leave the house to find one.

As Bill Hicks once said, "Ladies, if men could do that, you'd be here alone tonight...watching an empty stage."

Matthew

01-30-2006, 08:20 PM

Well, if it's any consololation the last 10 years have not been good to my flexibility and midsection. I highly doubt I could reach it again.

phit_demon

01-30-2006, 10:08 PM

with a girl that is boinking another guy
I'm sorry...did you just say "boinking"?!! What are you, 12?!

As Bill Hicks once said, "Ladies, if men could do that, you'd be here alone tonight...watching an empty stage."
And how right he was. All hail the almighty Hicks!

BAMSS04

01-30-2006, 10:48 PM

Ahh, a Bill Hicks reference...... Robbo, you have put a smile on my face just mentioning his name. Another dead hero.

phit_demon

01-30-2006, 10:55 PM

http://www.centripedus.com/images/bill_hicks_jason_scade.jpg
If I start going on about him, I'll never stop, but I really loved this pic when I saw it, so I'll leave it at this.

BAMSS04

01-30-2006, 11:36 PM

http://members.tripod.com/ToolKoRny/Bill_Hicks_Knee.gif

This is in the visor of my car at all times. My two loves. Comedy and Tool.

Zens7s

01-31-2006, 12:19 PM

Fuck Buddies? My god, you kids. No, really, I've got some friends that play that game. I've seen it go horribly awry. "Good" friends lose what they had. And then the rest of us, have to sort through the crap. I just would rather watch porn, and take care of myself. ;)
I second that. I haven't ever had a fuck buddy, even though the majority of my friends and my college roommates (post sorority) were men. I think that once you cross the line into knowing what their "Oh face" looks like you aren't just friends anymore. There is always that uncomfortable dimension. I am still friends with guys I hung out with back in high school, but if I had slept with them I bet they would have hit the highway.

Before "friends" could bring along a date on your group nights out and nobody got pissed. Once you have slept together one of the two parties is going to get jealous...either because they secretly have grander feelings for the other person, or because they don't want to lose the sex. Either way...ends badly.

karmattack

01-31-2006, 01:09 PM

You know, I've had the exact opposite experience. Since October, I've slept with two girls I've been long time friends with. Now I'm with a girl I would consider my girlfriend. Everybody involved knows all there is to know about everyone else involved, and everyone is as hunky-dorey as always. You can take my word for it, or I can give the long version of the story. All it takes is openness, honesty, and compassionate sensitivity.

And I would never ever use the term Fuck Buddies.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-31-2006, 01:10 PM

I've slept with two girlsI salute you sir.

karmattack

01-31-2006, 01:16 PM

Three courses of action:

1. You're being sarcastic, and I slap you with a pair of leather gloves and get out the pistols.

2. You're being sincere, to which I humbly take your compliment.

3. You're being sincere, to which I reply "those were only the girls 'I was long term friends with'."

HEY-O!

The overall total is 3 since October including my girlfriend, if anyone is really wondering.

Robbo_the_Hood

01-31-2006, 01:23 PM

Sincere, Dude. I mean, at once and everything. My hat is off to you.

karmattack

01-31-2006, 01:37 PM

Ok, now I get the joke. Sorry, I didn't have my helmet on yet. I wasn't prepared for thought.

Zens7s

01-31-2006, 01:40 PM

Maybe it's not using the term fuck buddies that changes it. Not sure. In my mind fuck buddies is purely sex...but you can sleep with a friend because you are trying out a relationship and it's different.

The guy I have been dating was my friend for over a year before we moved beyond. He knows the good and the bad, and is still around anyway. It's so much easier to not have to worry about explaining your deal to someone.

Sometimes its funny becasue he knows my ex very well and would also like to run over him for other reasons besides me.

Zens7s

01-31-2006, 01:41 PM

karmattack

01-31-2006, 01:55 PM

I'm actually beginning to feel like I've had them for too long as it is. I think Robbo's been generous.

By-tor

01-31-2006, 02:44 PM

Everybody involved knows all there is to know about everyone else involved, and everyone is as hunky-dorey as always.

All it takes is openness, honesty, and compassionate sensitivity.
As I mentioned before, hunky-dorey now, doesn't insure hunky-dorey later. The scenario is exactly like one I've seen go to shit.

But, hell, Karma, I wish you the best of luck.

Zens7s

01-31-2006, 02:46 PM

As I mentioned before, hunky-dorey now, doesn't insure hunky-dorey later. The scenario is exactly like one I've seen go to shit.

But, hell, Karma, I wish you the best of luck.
I think the problem is that there is too much hunky-dorey. Doing too much of that will make you go blind.

By-tor

01-31-2006, 02:54 PM

I think the problem is that there is too much hunky-dorey. Doing too much of that will make you go blind.Hunky-dorey? With Karma, it's more like hunky-scorey.
Cha-ching.

Zens7s

01-31-2006, 02:59 PM

Hunky-dorey? With Karma, it's more like hunky-scorey.
Cha-ching.
No kidding. I had to bring a wiffle ball bat just to beat them off at Disneyland. It brought new meaning to the phrase "Please do not rock the ride".

Incidentally, am I the only one that said wiffle ball bat and thought of the Beastie Boys?

jjcourtright

01-31-2006, 03:23 PM

I can't play "baseball" with the boys without thinking of Paul Revere.

karmattack

01-31-2006, 04:37 PM

In my mind fuck buddies is purely sex...but you can sleep with a friend because you are trying out a relationship and it's different.
That's really what both these scenarios were -- friends with an idea there could be more. The 'more' wasn't there in one way or another, so we went back to being friends.

There was a hiccup with one of the girls for a moment. OK, I'll actually give the whole story:

Linda and I have been very close friends for a little over a year, and we're more alike than any other two people I've met -- same talents, hobbies, taste in music, taste in movies, sense of humor, same vices, same family backgrounds. We met at a local restaurant where she tends bar and hit it off instantly. Everything was there for me but a strong physical attraction. We tested dating for a couple weeks or more in October, a portion of which I was dating another girl and being totally upfront about it. So it wasn't really all that serious, although I know she liked me a lot and wanted things to develop.

When it wasn't developing for me, I knew I had to tell her right away so as not to drag things out and let feelings get hurt. I was a little afraid to be completely honest, so I gave her one of the universal blow-offs, "I just have a lot going on right now and I'm not emotionally available." A couple months went by and we still hung out and talked a lot, but just like it was before in the 'friend' times. She started dating a guy and really liked (likes) him, which we sometimes talked about. I still visited her at work at least weekly, usually the same night another one of her friend-guys I get along with hangs out up there.

So during this time, I really started to notice Crystal, one of the servers at the restaurant -- I couldn't keep my eyes off her and thought she was really ineresting. Here starts the hiccup. I knew I really wanted to talk to Crystal, so I asked her for her number. She was hesitant at first because I had dated Linda, which I responded to with "Oh, I wouldn't have even asked, but she has a boyfriend now. We totally just friends." I figured I should be open and honest with Linda, so I mentoined to her (really without much tact at all) that I wanted to talk to Crystal and I wanted to make sure she was OK with that. Well, she wasn't at all. In fact, she was really pissed that I even considered it.

The miscommunication there was that her rule is friends and co-workers can never date people you've dated and she thought that was universal. Personally, I've dated a few girls my friends have dated and several of my friends have dated girls from my past -- we're just open and understanding like that, but it's respectful. So once she got over the fact that I asked, and understood where I was coming from, I told her that our friendship was more important and that I wouldn't pursue things with Crystal. I also took the opportunity to be honest with her about why we wouldn't have more than a friendship, and I apologized for not being upfront in the first place.

During the couple weeks after that, I hung out with her and her friends a lot, met her boyfriend hung out with him. It's not that I was manipulating the situation, but I thought given enough time she would realize that we're just friends and give up the feelings she was holding on to. I was putting the ball in her court so she could CHOOSE to free me up to date. After a while, and realizing that she wasn't going to give up her control (and seeing/talking to Crystal again of course), I told her that she was being selfish, that if she was really my friendship she would want me to be happy above everything else, and that although I truly cared about her feelings I couldn't let them control me.

From then on, I started dating Crystal who is now my girlfriend. We've been utterly tactful about who we were hanging around together and when, while also not acting like we're hiding anything or that we have anything to hide. We just tried to make sure nobody's feelings got hurt, and that everybody knew we were trying to do the right thing. Since then, I've hung out with Linda and all her friends that I was friends with before and everything is fine. It really, really is. I know the whole thing sounds dramatic and impossible, but because of openness, honesty, compassion, some tact, and a little maturity, the friendship endured.