View Full Version : Ever get that feeling?
...that feeling it's just not working out? Whatever "it" might be? Maybe you've outgrown it or just moved on in a different direction with only the most tenuous of ties binding you... You've moved forward, but that tie, that string- regardless of it's fragility- has you locked into place, steps away from letting go and moving on completely. Your feet keep moving but they only bite into the ground, digging a hole- and soon you realize you're looking up over a rim of earth and you see that the ties that bind are not only holding you back, but they are holding you down in this hole, this grave- someone hands you a pair of scissors and yet you refuse to cut the string, even though outside the hole and beyond the reach of the tether is an entire world, ready and waiting. You refuse to cut the string because the hole is now comfortable and safe. You refuse to climb out because this hole is yours and no one else's. The hole is you. Even though you're walking down the street, thousands of miles from what and who you were- the hole is still there within you. A cavity. A pit. An abscese on the soul. And you sit in it and wallow in the misery of would have, could have, and should have.
Time to cut the ties. Time to fill in the hole. Time to move on.
freetoaster
10-10-2005, 09:32 PM
Oh yeah...
Only thing even weirder, is when you are looking at old photographs. In the photo is someone you remember, vaguely. They are holding a toddler, both of them sporting smiles. Then, as you look at the people closer, you realize its you and your daughter, seated on the porch of a home where you used to live.
I swear I felt like I was almost looking at a stranger. There was no self pitty, no remorse, just an image of someone else's life. A snap-shot from a now, long forgotten, long-ago.
Psyche
10-11-2005, 01:59 AM
if by 'it' you mean life..then I get that feeling daily
psychofiend
10-11-2005, 08:47 AM
...that feeling it's just not working out? Whatever "it" might be? Maybe you've outgrown it or just moved on in a different direction with only the most tenuous of ties binding you... You've moved forward, but that tie, that string- regardless of it's fragility- has you locked into place, steps away from letting go and moving on completely. Your feet keep moving but they only bite into the ground, digging a hole- and soon you realize you're looking up over a rim of earth and you see that the ties that bind are not only holding you back, but they are holding you down in this hole, this grave- someone hands you a pair of scissors and yet you refuse to cut the string, even though outside the hole and beyond the reach of the tether is an entire world, ready and waiting. You refuse to cut the string because the hole is now comfortable and safe. You refuse to climb out because this hole is yours and no one else's. The hole is you. Even though you're walking down the street, thousands of miles from what and who you were- the hole is still there within you. A cavity. A pit. An abscese on the soul. And you sit in it and wallow in the misery of would have, could have, and should have.
Time to cut the ties. Time to fill in the hole. Time to move on.
Dude, if there is anything i try to refrain from, it's trying to talk about my "feelings" on the moviepoopshoot board. I don't have feelings left, but if i did then i wouldn't talk about it. The best people to talk to about this are not people you don't know on a message board. I do, however like all the metaphors... quite artful.
Time to cut the ties. Time to fill in the hole. Time to move on.
Time to prepare yourself for a new adventure. Good luck and have fun jk. :)
ozchick
10-11-2005, 09:31 AM
...that feeling it's just not working out? Whatever "it" might be? Maybe you've outgrown it or just moved on in a different direction with only the most tenuous of ties binding you... You've moved forward, but that tie, that string- regardless of it's fragility- has you locked into place, steps away from letting go and moving on completely. Your feet keep moving but they only bite into the ground, digging a hole- and soon you realize you're looking up over a rim of earth and you see that the ties that bind are not only holding you back, but they are holding you down in this hole, this grave- someone hands you a pair of scissors and yet you refuse to cut the string, even though outside the hole and beyond the reach of the tether is an entire world, ready and waiting. You refuse to cut the string because the hole is now comfortable and safe. You refuse to climb out because this hole is yours and no one else's. The hole is you. Even though you're walking down the street, thousands of miles from what and who you were- the hole is still there within you. A cavity. A pit. An abscese on the soul. And you sit in it and wallow in the misery of would have, could have, and should have.
Time to cut the ties. Time to fill in the hole. Time to move on.
Did we just get a Dear John letter from JK? :(
Did we just get a Dear John letter from JK? :(
I hope not. At least that's not how I took it. But then again, I am a little dense.
Mighty Wingman
10-11-2005, 09:37 AM
...But you're alot cute so that completely makes up for it.
ozchick
10-11-2005, 09:38 AM
It's not how I took it originally either, then I saw what was written under his name and re-read his post. That sucks.
Jason_Brown
10-11-2005, 09:46 AM
"MoviePoopShoot.com - It's like an abscess on the soul!"
Chris will be happy to see we have a new motto. ;)
Zens7s
10-11-2005, 11:42 AM
Dude, if there is anything i try to refrain from, it's trying to talk about my "feelings" on the moviepoopshoot board. I don't have feelings left, but if i did then i wouldn't talk about it. The best people to talk to about this are not people you don't know on a message board. I do, however like all the metaphors... quite artful.
Oh you could go my route and only discuss my actual feelings on a message board where you are bascially anoyomous. I never tell people I know in the real world what I am thinking. They end up using it against you. ;)
ozchick
10-11-2005, 11:44 AM
Zens, what do you think? Did JK just break up with us?
Zens7s
10-11-2005, 11:45 AM
Did we just get a Dear John letter from JK? :(
I certainly hope not. I interpreted it that he may not be staying in Atlanta and with the job. I remember when he moved out there it was a really tough decision that he wrestled with, especially being so far away from his financee. Maybe he has decided to make some big changes, come back to Texas, or strike out on a whole new path.
I hope that is the case, because I will really miss him if he has decided to leave.
ozchick
10-11-2005, 11:47 AM
I certainly hope not. I interpreted it that he may not be staying in Atlanta and with the job. I remember when he moved out there it was a really tough decision that he wrestled with, especially being so far away from his financee. Maybe he has decided to make some big changes, come back to Texas, or strike out on a whole new path.
I hope that is the case, because I will really miss him if he has decided to leave.
I initially thought that it was about his fiance or job too, but now I'm not so sure. It'll be a shame to see him go.
Zens7s
10-11-2005, 11:52 AM
I initially thought that it was about his fiance or job too, but now I'm not so sure. It'll be a shame to see him go.
Of course, she is finally moving there...so maybe he is reinventing himself as the non-board(bored) swingin' almost married guy who doesn't need his net-nerd buddies to help him pass the time any longer. I would think it got pretty lonely all by himself up in Atlanta.
It's hard to say. Lots of us have left at various times when they need a break. Hopefully this is the case and not a final cut-off.
Although I can't think that the board really held him back from anything. That's why I am wondering if he is talking about something else.
speilburgh
10-11-2005, 12:06 PM
I didn't feel depressed today untill i read this... Now I can picture with vivid color. the hole i'm in.. and as you describe.. I AM holding a pair of scissors... but for some reason i just keep putting them down.
hrm... i guess, such is life.
Nice writing by the way.
freetoaster
10-11-2005, 12:27 PM
I had a frieand in college that had theory on depression. He said that each of us goes through two minor and one major depression(s), each month. I never really commented, sarcastic or otherwise, but I have always rembered it. Maybe JK is going through a sort of odd-wise orbit of funk. Kind of like the cycle of comets that pass through our solar-system once every seventy some-odd years. Maybe he divulged too much information recently and...well...anyway, some of us tend to get pretty involved on this particular board.
Personal, sometimes deeply personal, stuff comes up. Like the Dear John thread. People can learn things from just knowing you visit a site. Things you wouldn't necessarily divulge at work etc. It can become a definite liability. We smack eachother around, because we share a similiar bent sense of humor. Sometimes the one liners give way to the sense of anonymity...and shit just comes out.
Someone, like a co-worker, could read some our posts and take issue with what we've written. Some people just need to be defenestrated though.
Did I just step in something?
I think he is going through some changes. I mean one of his last post says he's a Chevy fan. I was under the impression that he was all about Jeeps. Anyway, I do hope he's ok. It sucks being dumped, but we'll just sigh and weep about it for a while, then we'll get over it. He doesn't have to worry about us. :(
MW- You don't know that, but thanks for thinking it.
By-tor
10-11-2005, 12:32 PM
jk is a Texan, everything will turn out okay. It's destiny.
Zens7s
10-11-2005, 12:53 PM
I had a frieand in college that had theory on depression. He said that each of us goes through two minor and one major depression(s), each month. I never really commented, sarcastic or otherwise, but I have always rembered it. Maybe JK is going through a sort of odd-wise orbit of funk. Kind of like the cycle of comets that pass through our solar-system once every seventy some-odd years. Maybe he divulged too much information recently and...well...anyway, some of us tend to get pretty involved on this particular board.
Personal, sometimes deeply personal, stuff comes up. Like the Dear John thread. People can learn things from just knowing you visit a site. Things you wouldn't necessarily divulge at work etc. It can become a definite liability. We smack eachother around, because we share a similiar bent sense of humor. Sometimes the one liners give way to the sense of anonymity...and shit just comes out.
Someone, like a co-worker, could read some our posts and take issue with what we've written. Some people just need to be defenestrated though.
Did I just step in something?
I think you are right..this board, for WHATEVER wierd reason...really brought together a lot of people who really liked each other. Not in the hook up sense, but in the "I get your deal, you get mine, and we can sort of guide each other through this stuff somehow and maybe come out alive on the other end." We are not alike in the conventional sense, but we tend to have similar core values about what makes life able to move forward.
By nature, many of us are similar in our emotional structure. We are deeply emotional people, but not always the kind of people who show that to the outside world. If you asked people away from this board about me they would say that nothing ever bothers me and that I am pretty cold. Is that true? No way. If you asked people here the same question I am guessing they would say the opposite.
You are right...some truly personal things come out around here. It is possible that somebody from our other worlds could stumble in. But the chances are low. As someone once reminded me, "If you go to a swingers club, and run into your boss, then it means they were there too." If you were on the board for a long period of time you could figure out who I am and where I work and what I do very easily. However, on the flip side of non-board life it would be hard for them to ever find here. I don't tell anyone I know HOW I know you people...just that we know each other through mutual friends. When my real world collides with my board world it's a convienent answer.
It's an interesting thought that we all go through small depressions each month and I would agree. But without those dips and sometimes canyons we could never really recognize the hills and the mountains. I wouldn't want that. I'll take the days when I want to cash in my chips and never leave the house again to be able to recognize the days when you feel like everything has fallen into place.
I may not be right, but it's the only way I know to keep on keepin' on.
Razorback
10-11-2005, 01:02 PM
Oh you could go my route and only discuss my actual feelings on a message board where you are bascially anoyomous. I never tell people I know in the real world what I am thinking. They end up using it against you. ;)
There is a common saying among my real world and virtual friends "You never tell me anything about yourself." Uh huh. I know.
And I never will.
By-tor
10-11-2005, 01:37 PM
By nature, many of us are similar in our emotional structure. We are deeply emotional people, but not always the kind of people who show that to the outside world. Nailed it, Zens
Mighty Wingman
10-11-2005, 06:07 PM
MW- You don't know that, but thanks for thinking it.
Actually , I do know that. Don't doubt it for a second.
Zens7s
10-11-2005, 07:11 PM
Actually , I do know that. Don't doubt it for a second.
..........Urrrupp................
[Zen blushes]
Oops, sorry. I just threw up in my mouth a little.
Dammit JJ, you are so right about Chipotle! It doesn't mix with beer or sentiments with extra cheese.
:D
Mighty Wingman
10-11-2005, 11:25 PM
You know she's cute, quit vomming. Anyone with her disposition would just have to be.
I was thinking, if the women of the pooshoot banded together they'd be unstoppable.
..Like Fox Force Five.
FOX, because you're a bunch of foxes
FORCE, because you're a force to be reckoned with
FIVE, as in, there's one, two, three, four FIVE of you.
Zens7s
10-12-2005, 12:04 AM
You know she's cute, quit vomming. Anyone with her disposition would just have to be.
I was thinking, if the women of the pooshoot banded they'd be unstoppable.
..Like Fox Force Five.
FOX, because you're a bunch of foxes
FORCE, because you're a force to be reckoned with
FIVE, as in, there's one, two, three, four FIVE of you.
It wasn't her looks that were causing the eruption. I suddenly became lactose-intolerant.
Keep it up funny boy. You had better hope that FanGirl hasn't re-rented her couch yet.
Mighty Wingman
10-12-2005, 12:07 AM
Well if worst comes to worst I'll move in with RB. We'll be like the odd couple, he'll be Felix and I'll be Oscar.
ILovePapaSmurf
10-12-2005, 12:12 AM
And if that was to happen, I'd visit more often..
Zens7s
10-12-2005, 12:14 AM
And if that was to happen, I'd visit more often..
This could work out for both of us. When RB and Wingman go to bed early you and I can stay up drinking and telling what wierd little things they do with their tongues.
Zens7s
10-12-2005, 10:09 AM
I talked to JK. He is going through a lot of life changes right now and needs some time to get caught up on those things. The bad news is that he won't be around as much for a while. The good news is that he will be back, and that wasn't a Dear John to the shoot.
So unti lhe returns send good thought vibes his way. Ever been in that place where everything stops making sense for a while? Yep. Thought so. :)
ozchick
10-12-2005, 10:11 AM
Thanks for the update Zens. If you talk to him again, let him know I'll be sending happy vibes his way. I have no clue how to do this, but I'm prepared to research it and give it a go.
Razorback
10-12-2005, 11:45 AM
Well if worst comes to worst I'll move in with RB. We'll be like the odd couple, he'll be Felix and I'll be Oscar.
Man, you REALLY don't know me very well. :D
Is he talking about a cat and a hotdog?
Razorback
10-12-2005, 02:22 PM
Is he talking about a cat and a hotdog?
You are so cute, it drives me nuts that I can't have you!
Mighty Wingman
10-12-2005, 02:34 PM
Man, you REALLY don't know me very well. :D
Course I do, I wont even complain when you sing-a-long with Kelly on your Karaoke machine.
You are so cute, it drives me nuts that I can't have you!
Drives me nuts that she pretends not to know it.
Razorback
10-12-2005, 02:36 PM
Course I do, I wont even complain when you sing-a-long with Kelly on your Karaoke machine.
"Since u been gooooooooneeee!!!!"
Drives me nuts that she pretends not to know it.
Chicas....
I think it's hot when a guy can sing along to Prince.
"Make the rules; and break em all, cuz you are the best. Yeah you are..."
Zens7s
10-12-2005, 02:59 PM
Drives me nuts that she pretends not to know it.
[Zen walks over to the fridge, bends over, and reaches way into the back and extracts a full block of Velveeta]
Here Wingman, I was saving this for the queso dip for the party, but you are almost out of cheese.
No, don't worry about me needed it...I will just go buy another block on the way to my new boyfriends house.
He meant me pretending not knowing who Oscar and Felix are, right Wingman?
(I want to keep my lungs. I need them.)
Razorback
10-12-2005, 03:04 PM
I think it's hot when a guy can sing along to Prince.
You should have been there for lunch today. I was singing Prince songs. :D
I was there.
I'm stalking you. ;)
I'm kidding. Though it would've been nice to be there and hear you sing.
Zens7s
10-12-2005, 03:17 PM
I was there.
I'm stalking you. ;)
I'm kidding. Though it would've been nice to be there and hear you sing.
I would pay cash-money to hear that! Let's sneak into his office and bug it. :D
Ok, but how we going to sneak past his mom? ;)
Razorback
10-12-2005, 03:27 PM
My mom is mostly deaf. :)
jjcourtright
10-12-2005, 03:39 PM
Dammit JJ, you are so right about Chipotle! It doesn't mix with beer or sentiments with extra cheese.
:DHey, don't shoot the messenger.
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