This is bullshit!

[Asteban]

Ok I need help. Big help. My mom is insanely controlling. I won't go into any unnecessary details, but I will get to the main point.

Here's the thing. I'm a very goal oriented person, and I decided not too long ago what I want to do with my life. I told my mom about me wanting to be a Journalist, she didn't like the idea, she wanted me to do something else, she liked it better when I wanted to be a teacher. All that shit. And I told her I wanted to go to Eastern Illinois University, because they have a good Journalism program, and I've wanted to go there for about 2 years anyway, even before Journalism was in the picture. But everytime I bring up college, she suggests Illinois State...of which I REALLY do not want to go to. Besides that school is MUCH more expensive. Eastern is the cheapest state school in Illinois, and its quality. Then she says she wants me to go to the same community college that she did, then go to Illinois State like she did. Major in the same thing she did. And she just WON'T let it go. I've never been like her, and she's always tried to make me be like her. It's gotten so out of hand that I don't know what to do. Everytime college is mentioned we end up arguing about it.

I can't afford to waste my time at a community college that doesn't have shit for a Journalism program, especially if I'm going to write for any big magazines (*cough* Rolling Stone).

It's driving me absolutely insane. Anyone have advice?

[By-tor]

Pffft...women, can't live with 'em. Hmmm...yeah that's about it.
Seriously, you can't worry about your mom. She'll get over whatever decision you make. If not, does it matter? Ya can't live your life, repeat your life, based on what your mother wants.

[Asteban]

She's a pain in the ass. She never makes any sense. What's that, we may not have money to send you to college.... BUT I WILL SUGGEST SCHOOLS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN THE ONE YOU WANT TO ATTEND! Go go, super ridiculogic. She's going to send me to the psych ward.

[Droogan_Leader]

It's driving me absolutely insane. Anyone have advice?

You know what you want to do, right? So, do it. When your mother finally realizes that you are your own person [however long that takes], she'll start to respect your individual decisions. Why she's controlling, who knows, but it really doesn't matter--you know what you have to/want to do. Best wishes in doing it!

[Robbo_the_Hood]

All I can recommend is applying for as many grants and scholarships as you possibly can. Seriously, get a book on grant writing; there are tons and not nearly as expensive as that Matthew Lesco character. You can get scholarships for having red hair. Try to get as much financial aid, save student loans, to where you won't need your mom's help.

[Zens7s]

Everytime college is mentioned we end up arguing about it.

I can't afford to waste my time at a community college that doesn't have shit for a Journalism program, especially if I'm going to write for any big magazines (*cough* Rolling Stone).

It's driving me absolutely insane. Anyone have advice?

Yes, go to Northern Illinois Unversity. Go Huskies! Sorry, had to get the nod in to my alma mater. Skip ISU because it produced my ex-husband and look where he ended up :) Besides, NIU is much farther away from your mom and sometimes this is a good thing.

In all seriousness, there are two options:
1) You could go to ISU and still major in journalism because in the end it doesn't really matter where you went to college unless you are going Ivy League. What really matters is what you do with the knowledge you get. Trust me on this...I have two Notre Dame grads, a Brown grad, and a Stanford grad who work for me...clueless is clueless and they are all really broke.

2) You could decide that your mother has a right to her opinion, however overbearing it may be, and that you are going to Eastern on your own dollar. When she starts to rant just say "well, you are not footing the bill, but thank you for voicing your concern"

You have a higher probability of flunking out under option one, because anything people force you to do usually ends up a mess. You have a smaller probability of flunking out under option 2, but your college career will be more stressful with work and loans. However, you could get internships, etc that may help advance your career farther anyway. Plus, EIU is a state school, so you are not trying to foot the bill for private tuituion. On your own you can get grants up the wazoo.

[BAMSS04]

Well, lets see. Do what you want to do!!!! Thats all that matters. Student Loans will take care of the rest!! Good Luck!!

[Asteban]

Yeah, thanks everyone. I think she's just pissed that I decided not to be a teacher after saying that's what I wanted to do for about 4 years. She had a similar reaction when I said I didn't want to be a veterinarian, because that's what I used to want to do also. I really never cared as much about those things.

[jjcourtright]

The most important thing that you can do is to fill out your FAFSA (http://www.fafsa.ed.gov) form as soon as you and you parents are done with your taxes next year. More money is available at the beginning of the year than there is in the summer. I never had much use for counselors in high school, so no one ever passed on this pearl of wisdom to me. I had to leave CU-Boulder after only one semester because I was out of money...because I didn't fill out a FAFSA. Es muy importante!

[Razorback]

Yeah, thanks everyone. I think she's just pissed that I decided not to be a teacher after saying that's what I wanted to do for about 4 years. She had a similar reaction when I said I didn't want to be a veterinarian, because that's what I used to want to do also. I really never cared as much about those things.

It doesn't matter what you want to do... by the time you are 30 you will probably have changed careers at least twice (not just your mind about what you want to do).

By the time you are 50 you will have changed careers around four times, if not more. That is the reality of today's world. People rarely stay in their field for decades. So, you can be a vet, teacher, and porn star, and still make astronaut before you are 40.

Oh and FAFSA is your life.

[Zens7s]

It doesn't matter what you want to do... by the time you are 30 you will probably have changed careers at least twice (not just your mind about what you want to do).

By the time you are 50 you will have changed careers around four times, if not more. That is the reality of today's world. People rarely stay in their field for decades. So, you can be a vet, teacher, and porn star, and still make astronaut before you are 40.

Oh and FAFSA is your life.
What is wrong with being a porn star teacher?

[Matt1]

Not a thing. I had a substitute teacher in high school who, while not a pornstar, did pose for Playboy and the fact only served to endear to the (male) student body. Attendance, amongst other things, was always up when it was known she would be filling in.

[Zens7s]

Not a thing. I had a substitute teacher in high school who, while not a pornstar, did pose for Playboy and the fact only served to endear to the (male) student body. Attendance, amongst other things, was always up when it was known she would be filling in.One of my former sorority sisters was an education major and now does porn.

Ironically, she was the most uptight virginal of anyone in the house before. Hog-wild I guess.

[Dave]

and this little co-eds porn name would be....

[Razorback]

What is wrong with being a porn star teacher?

Nothing. I plan on marrying one.

[jjcourtright]

Not a thing. I had a substitute teacher in high school who, while not a pornstar, did pose for Playboy and the fact only served to endear to the (male) student body. Attendance, amongst other things, was always up when it was known she would be filling in. A similar (http://daily.gazette.com/Repository/ml.asp?Ref=VGhlR2F6ZXR0ZS8yMDA1LzA3LzEyI0FyMDExMDQ =&Mode=HTML&Locale=english-skin-custom) thing is going on here in the Springs. Unfortunately it probably won't end up quite as well as "attendance being up."

[bwdial]

She's a pain in the ass. She never makes any sense. What's that, we may not have money to send you to college.... BUT I WILL SUGGEST SCHOOLS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN THE ONE YOU WANT TO ATTEND! Go go, super ridiculogic. She's going to send me to the psych ward.

Oooh...that's cheaper than college and you don't have to pay for the drugs. :p

[Zens7s]

and this little co-eds porn name would be....I don't remember anymore and it really bums me out! I only heard it once and it was about 3 years ago. I could attempt to find her, but that isn't a good idea at work :)

[Psyche]

sounds like my mom. maybe thats why I moved 1300 miles away and married someone without her knowing =D

[ozchick]

I guess I've been pretty blessed with my mum whose been supportive of everything we've chosen or not chosen to do. I can't even imagine a parent not supporting journalism. It's not like you said "Hey mum, I'm going to be a stripper"! So yeah I don't have any advice sorry but if it were me, I'd go it on my own.

[By-tor]

It's not like you said "Hey mum, I'm going to be a stripper"!
Better than being a TV evangelist.:D

[Dave]

I'm just resurrecting this thread, because frankly i like the title. Now on with my story.

So there we were, the wife and I were gassing up the car before leaving to go to Charleston for our anniversary. Because i'm a bit of a bastard, i was outside the passanger door talking over the car too Kristi as she filled up the car with petrol. Directly beside me, at the pumps opposite us, a young lady gets into her rusty old Chevy Blazer. You've seen the type, pigtails and dyed black hair, a few too many tattoos, fishnets. Bumpstickers on the back window of her truck, above the dented in bumper, that say things like "Save the Environment" "Nashville Pussy" "War is Terrorism Too!". Anyway, this lovely young woman, gets into her vehicle and instead of pulling forward thru the pumps -- there was no-one in front of her -- she desides to back out of her place, but in doing so, she cut the wheel of her car too soon, and scrapped her gigantic metal bumper down the lenght of my wifes Accord. I had to leap out of the way or she would have gotten me, too. The cops were called (much to her shagrin i might add) and reports were filled out.I think she was high at the time as it was 7:30 am, cloudy and her eyes were very consticted, but i didn't want her busted for that or anything, i just want my car fixed. Well i found out today, from my insurance company that this lovely young lady does not have any car insurance, so now i get to pay my deductable myself. Joy! What a great anniversary gift this stranger has given me, a $500 bill for body and paint work. Thanks for letting me vent.

Dave

[Zens7s]

I'm just resurrecting this thread, because frankly i like the title. Now on with my story.

So there we were, the wife and I were gassing up the car before leaving to go to Charleston for our anniversary. Because i'm a bit of a bastard, i was outside the passanger door talking over the car too Kristi as she filled up the car with petrol. Directly beside me, at the pumps opposite us, a young lady gets into her rusty old Chevy Blazer. You've seen the type, pigtails and dyed black hair, a few too many tattoos, fishnets. Bumpstickers on the back window of her truck, above the dented in bumper, that say things like "Save the Environment" "Nashville Pussy" "War is Terrorism Too!". Anyway, this lovely young woman, gets into her vehicle and instead of pulling forward thru the pumps -- there was no-one in front of her -- she desides to back out of her place, but in doing so, she cut the wheel of her car too soon, and scrapped her gigantic metal bumper down the lenght of my wifes Accord. I had to leap out of the way or she would have gotten me, too. The cops were called (much to her shagrin i might add) and reports were filled out.I think she was high at the time as it was 7:30 am, cloudy and her eyes were very consticted, but i didn't want her busted for that or anything, i just want my car fixed. Well i found out today, from my insurance company that this lovely young lady does not have any car insurance, so now i get to pay my deductable myself. Joy! What a great anniversary gift this stranger has given me, a $500 bill for body and paint work. Thanks for letting me vent.

Dave
I bet she knows what happened to my IROC.

Doesn't that just kill you? My girlfriend just had her 1 week old Tahoe broken into at work. Note - she works at a Lockheed Martin facility. So much for parking lot security at a national defense contractor. Now she gets to pay the $500 deduct and watch her rates go up.

When the ROC got stolen I got to subtract the $500 from the check they wrong, so I really got nothing back. Plus, I now find, most insurance companies have me as a high risk client because I have a stolen vehicle. So even though I have not had an accident or a ticket in a long time I will pay the maximum. Insurance is the biggest fraud in the world.

[Dave]

you said it sister! Insurance = Big Boo!

[ILovePapaSmurf]

My insurance company is shit. When I had someone hit my parked car, they made me pay for my car rental. I had to extend my credit limit from a low $200 bucks to $700 bucks to front the downpayment. I fought to get someone of it back and got a refund check of $450 from the lady's insurance. They told me that that was all they can afford and of course, I had to rent the liberty. Finally, I told my insurance company about it and they paid $160 of it, but the total cost of the bill was $900 bucks, so that didn't really help and now I am an in more debt than I wanted to be in at this time.

Dave, I am sorry you have to fork out the money, but can't you take her to small claims court to get it back?

[Dave]

i can, i quess, i have a friend who is a lawyer (the kind that has billboards and tv commercials on during "Texas Justice") so i'm going to ask him about it, but frankly it seems like a lot of hassle to go into. I'm going to let Progressive try to get it out of her first, but i'm not really sure she gave the cop correct information when he filled out the report. A lot of inconsitancies, she may be hard to find and bring to court.

[ILovePapaSmurf]

There is no harm in trying. You shouldn't have to put out any money for something that was not your fault.

[Dave]

yeah, i know. I should have to put up with the hassle either.