Suspicious package?

[JK]

...indeed: Device that forced I-75 and Daniels shut was a prosthetic penis

By SARAH LUNDY
SLUNDY@NEWS-PRESS.COM
Published by news-press.com (http://www.news-press.com/) on May 24, 2005


The suspicious object that jammed traffic Monday on Interstate 75 and Daniels Parkway was not explosive, according to the Lee County Sheriff's Office.

The device — found on the side of Daniels Parkway under the northbound I-75 overpass — was a prosthetic penis. There's no word yet on whether the penis was designed to serve medical or recreational needs.

A motorist called the Lee County Sheriff’s Office shortly after 3 p.m. about the suspicious package on the side of the road under the northbound Interstate 75 overpass.

The cylinder was more than a foot long in a plastic bag and wrapped with duct tape. It looked like a pipe bomb.

Deputies arrived and alerted the bomb squad, which used a robot to disable the cylinder. The north- and southbound lanes of Intestate 75 were closed for about an hour between Alico Road and Colonial Boulevard. Traffic was blocked on Daniels Parkway at the overpass for an hour while the device was removed.

[ILovePapaSmurf]

There's no word yet on whether the penis was designed to serve medical or recreational needs.

Wow, who in the world would want to know that?

[ratm1966]

The cylinder was more than a foot long
So, it was about average in size? ;)

I guess that it could be considered explosive if it was intended for recreational purposes eh? :D

[JK]

Wow, who in the world would want to know that?

Inquiring minds..?

I like this one... The suspicious object... ...was not explosive, according to the Lee County Sheriff's Office.


Someone else might consider it explosive?

And who the hell throws a strap-on out of a moving vehicle?

[TomHarrington]

Deputies arrived and alerted the bomb squad, which used a robot to disable the cylinder.

Disable it? What, they took the batteries out?

[Denyse]

Somewhere, there's a bachelorette party going on, sans entertainment.

[ILovePapaSmurf]

Disable it? What, they took the batteries out?

Wait, they have prosthetic penises which are battery operated? Wow, I need to visit a local porn store, stat!

[Zens7s]

Phew - I have been looking for that EVERYWHERE!

Thank heaven it was found. That is the last time I put my luggage in the back of the convertible rental car while driving in Atlanta...

[FanGirl]

"Nine time out of ten, it's an electric razor. But, every once in a while ... (whispers) ...it's a dildo. It's airline policy not to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We use the indefinite article: 'A dildo.' Never 'Your dildo.'"

[Matt1]

The suspicious object that jammed traffic Monday on Interstate 75 and Daniels Parkway was not explosive, according to the Lee County Sheriff's Office.
And with that sentence, Sarah Lundy goes on my list of very funny people for the day.

[Razorback]

There's no word yet on whether the penis was designed to serve medical or recreational needs.

You know the reporter had to have been laughing her ass off writing that.

Deputies arrived and alerted the bomb squad, which used a robot to disable the cylinder.

My ex was a robotic disabler [sic] of my cylinder.

[Mighty Wingman]

My ex was a robotic disabler [sic] of my cylinder.

She Bobbit-ized you ? :)

[Razorback]

She Bobbit-ized you ? :)

May as well have...

[JK]

Here's an update from the lovely Sarah Lundy...

The “suspicious package” that caused Interstate 75 and Daniels Parkway to be shut for more than an hour Monday was not an explosive pipe bomb — but rather wrapped-up plastic foot-long penis.

“Someone took construction-grade plastic, molded it into a penis and wrapped it with duct tape,” said Lee County Sheriff’s Chief Deputy Charles Ferrante.

“They wrote ‘Happy Father’s Day’ on the duct tape.”

The device was first described by the sheriff’s office as a prosthetic penis. Later, it cops described it as a paper sculpture made to look like a penis.

"(The rumor that it was actually a vibrator) just took a life of it's own," said Cpl. Larry King.

Ferrante later spoke with a member of the bomb squad who described it in more detail.

“Somebody molded it to look like a penis,” Ferrante said. “It was not detected until the suspicious package was removed.”

A motorist called the Lee County Sheriff’s Office Monday shortly after 3 p.m. about a suspicious package on the side of the road under the northbound Interstate 75 overpass.

The cylinder was more than a foot long in a plastic bag and wrapped with duct tape. It looked like pipe bomb and was in a position that could cause structural damage.

Deputies arrived and alerted the bomb squad, which used a robot to disable the cylinder. The north- and southbound lanes of Intestate 75 were closed for about an hour between Alico Road and Colonial Boulevard. Traffic was blocked on Daniels Parkway at the overpass for an hour while the device was removed.





Happy Father's Day!?!?

[psychofiend]

Here's an update from the lovely Sarah Lundy...

The “suspicious package” that caused Interstate 75 and Daniels Parkway to be shut for more than an hour Monday was not an explosive pipe bomb — but rather wrapped-up plastic foot-long penis.
Sounds like something my friend Kells Bells would get. She was bitching about her mom throwing away her dildo one day...