Make with your best pickup lines....

[EternalStrife]

....or at least those that nearly got you laid.

[Matthew]

Here are a few that didn't give me the desired results.

"Hey, nice shoes, wanna dance?" (No where, but a chuckle)

me: " I bet you a buck I can make your tits move without touching them"
girl: "Your On"
me: (grabbing her boobs while throwing a dollar bill on the bar) "You can keep the dollar." (Slapped)

"Enough Mr. Niceguy, come sit on my face." (Restraining order)

[code6enterprises]

Hey, uh, you wanna go do it?

[Zens_7s]

My old standby...

Are you from Tennesee? Cause you're the only Ten I see.

[EternalStrife]

Really? And that actually works?

[Zens_7s]

How would I know? I'm a girl. The only pickup line we need is "Hi."

[EternalStrife]

True enough. It's not fair that guys have to work at it. I meant, if a girl goes up to a guy in a bar and says 'Hi, wanna come back to my place?' and you can bet your ass that he'll be through her door before she even steps out the bar.

[Droogan_Leader]

A good [girl] friend of mine once told me that she thought it was only fair that guys should have to work for it. After all, she said, girls have to go through childbirth.

Besides, wooing a beautiful woman is fun, if you know what you're doing. Remember, laddie, a faint heart never won a fair maiden.

[karmattack]

[licks index fingers, straightens eyebrows, unbuttons shirt to expose large, gold pendant and adjusts butterfly collar.........leans against bar, looks at Zens]


...Hi. /forums/images/icons/smirk.gif

[Zens_7s]

[leans forward, purses heavily glossed lips, winds index finger around medallion]

Hey, baby. /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

[Razorback]

I don't know if any "line" ever helped get me laid... apathy followed by faked interest seems to work better than words.

RB

[EternalStrife]

Wooing a beautiful woman may be fun. But getting repeatedly shot down isn't.

[GoreFollower]

(This conversation took place when I was dating a girl that was pretty small, but yet again, I am 6' 4'')

G: You wanna do something?
M: Yeah, how about I bring you home in my pocket, and I'll feed you to my dog! (It was a joke, but she didn't laugh)

[EternalStrife]

You see? Now was that fun or wasn't it?

[GoreFollower]

It was definetely fun for me! /forums/images/icons/laugh.gif

[EternalStrife]

Hmm....maybe I'm doing it all wrong, then.

[FanGirl]

Not really a pick up line, but I so love it. It's from a Rat Bastard cartoon.

So what are you doing tonight? You know horizontally speaking.

[EternalStrife]

Well here's one I heard somewhere from before:

Hi, my name's [insert name here], and like the imac, I too come in five colours.

[psychofiend]

"If I made the alphabet I would put U and I together" [nowhere]
"I forgot my number, how about you sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up." [one time it worked]

[GoreFollower]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Hi, my name's [insert name here], and like the imac, I too come in five colours.

[/ QUOTE ]

I was drinking a glass of Orange juice the same time I was reading this! I now hate orange juice!

[Matt1]

I've never used a pick-up line in my life. Most girls, it seems, go for sincerity and sensitivity. So I just fake sincerity and sensitivity the best I can. /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

[Razorback]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Most girls, it seems, go for sincerity and sensitivity

[/ QUOTE ]

On what planet?

RB

[Omaru]

People call me pinnochio, sit on my face and I'll tell a lie.

[psychofiend]

I once tried the quiet cool/I'm so stupis it must be cute thing, it worked. But then eventually the girl I did it too seemed to [censored] stupid for me. I like intellegent girls.

[EternalStrife]

Intelligent girls are harder to pick up. They can spot your lies and put-ons better than most.

[psychofiend]

I like a challenge.

[GoreFollower]

Maybe we should try another High School Steven? Its just like Zach said, "All the girls at Wachusett are psychos!"

[GoreFollower]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
I like a challenge.

[/ QUOTE ]

But we both gave up on Laura Spencer Steven. (Or did we finally come to the conclusion that she was a lesbian?)

[psychofiend]

O well I will wait until I can drive to do that, since i can't get out of the [censored] town now.

[Razorback]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Intelligent girls are harder to pick up. They can spot your lies and put-ons better than most

[/ QUOTE ]

They fall for them anyway.

From some of the comments in this thread I could swear that many of you have never talked to a woman. /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

RB

[psychofiend]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Or did we finally come to the conclusion that she was a lesbian?

[/ QUOTE ]
Erased from my mind. You really shouldn't use real names you [censored] jackass.

[GoreFollower]

Why not? No one knows what the fuck you and me are talking about! If you think about it, they probably think that we're just messing with their heads! You [censored] jobless jackass!

[psychofiend]

I think it is a invasion of the persons privacy. Goddamn liberals don't understand anything.

[GoreFollower]

LISTEN YOU DUMB REPUBLICAN JACKASS!!!! I'M SICK OF YOUR [censored] LIBERAL JOKES!!!!! SO YOU CAN TAKE YOUR PRO-LIFE MEMOS AND DEAD BABY PICTURES, AND SHOVE IT RIGHT UP YOUR ASS!!!!!

P.S. I'll try and clean up my act about exposing other people, but for the mean time, FUCK YOU!

http://wh0rd.de/humor/pictures/shutthehellup.jpg

[psychofiend]

I am happy to say as long as there is a Republican in office you won't have to lose more of your hard earned money because the "schools" need it.

[Zens_7s]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
They fall for them anyway.

From some of the comments in this thread I could swear that many of you have never talked to a woman.

[/ QUOTE ]Ummm yeah. Right.

Speaking with 100% honestly, I don't think pick-up lines ever work unless the girl is very intoxicated, or very ignorant. If she is already in one of those two states you still won't need one.

Dumb lines only serve to make the guy look desperate. Nothing is a bigger turn-off than desperation. Simply walking over, and making some normal comment no different than you would make to a casual acquaintance works fine. Normal comments still allow you time to back out, no one feels uncomfortable, and we don’t mock you in the bathroom. NEVER let the girl smell weakness or fear. Act like talking to her is no different than conversing with your buddies. Self-confidence is a huge turn-on. There, I have made my peace with man.

[EternalStrife]

Yes....just watch anger managment and you'll see......

[Omaru]

that;s it, I think I'll try the one from Evangelion

"Do you want to become one with me" its honest and to the point! I dont think I've ever used a chat up line honestly, just said what I thought, and how I fewlt at the time.

[EternalStrife]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
.... and how I fewlt at the time.

[/ QUOTE ]

Probably small.

[Omaru]

I'm sensing hostility, maybe even jealousy, but back to the point, I can get much worse verbal assault from around my city (and do.) So I am immune to your amatueristic efforts.

[EternalStrife]

Wasn't being hostile. Just making an observation.

[Psyche]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
"Hey, nice shoes, wanna dance?" (No where, but a chuckle)

[/ QUOTE ]

it's supposed to be

'nice shoes wanna [censored] =x

[Psyche]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
They fall for them anyway.

From some of the comments in this thread I could swear that many of you have never talked to a woman.


[/ QUOTE ]

no we just get suckered into taking 'needy' cases

[karmattack]

Here, [brushes area around lips] let me clear off a space for you to sit down.

[Psyche]

heh if only i liked that /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

[karmattack]

I, uh, wasn't talking to you. I was talking to your cute friend.
[winks at Psychofiend]

[Psyche]

you mean my good guy friend? heh

[code6enterprises]

I always knew you were a lesbian, karma.

[Dr3vil]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Here, let me clear off a space for you to sit down.

[/ QUOTE ]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
I, uh, wasn't talking to you. I was talking to your cute friend.
[winks at Psychofiend]

[/ QUOTE ]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
you mean my good guy friend? heh

[/ QUOTE ]

Unless I missed something, that would make what Karma said the first [b]salad tossing one-liner of the thread.

[EternalStrife]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
nice shoes wanna [censored] =x

[/ QUOTE ]

I tried that once. Got my myself a restraining order........

[Falls to knees and holds boths hands straight up]

Why! Oh God why!!!!!!!!

[Razorback]

Yeah yeah... it doesn't matter how stupid the line, if the man is good looking enough most women ignore how idiotic the pick-up attempt was.

Being extremely good-looking, I can walk up to a woman and say "goony-goo-goo" and she will be mine. /forums/images/icons/wink.gif

RB

[EternalStrife]

Try ratta cha-cha gnoo gnoo eenee eenne aak aak booo weee hah!

[Razorback]

I just did... worked.

RB

[EternalStrife]

For me, it only worked for women from a galaxy far, far way......

[Zens_7s]

Nice to see all that action with the ladies has not shrunk your huge ego and spackled in the chip on your shoulder.

Maybe you are correct about "most woman", and I always expected too much from a guy. He had to have something besides a nice genetic ensemble and a stupid line to take me home. I was never one for charity work, especially when it comes to sleeping with idiots.

[DangerSeeker]

I require a decent sense of humor, so if I need to use a line as an intro (sometimes you can't just be nice and casual, you need an "in") I'll make it as bad a line as possible, and if I score a laugh I introduce myself politely.

Example: I've got the STD. I just need U to make me a STUD.

In a realistic setting, not a chance, but if she laughs, I know I will be able to make her laugh and go from there. If not, there would not be enough chemistry to make anything happen anyway. So use lines as a litmus test.

[Razorback]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Nice to see all that action with the ladies has not shrunk your huge ego and spackled in the chip on your shoulder.

[/ QUOTE ]

It is nice, isn't it?

RB

[EternalStrife]

Then what about the saying that opposites attract? People who have different views on the same idea tend to keep going at it. Whereas, if you have two people who share that same taste in opinions would run out of things to say rather quickly. If you both agree on the same topic, then what else is there to talk about?

[psychofiend]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
no we just get suckered into taking 'needy' cases

[/ QUOTE ]
the bank of fiend is pretty empty Psyche. /forums/images/icons/frown.gif /forums/images/icons/frown.gif

[ratm1966]

http://webpages.charter.net/bsweebe/Pics/Pickup1.gif

[ratm1966]

http://webpages.charter.net/bsweebe/Pics/Pickup2.gif

[ratm1966]

http://webpages.charter.net/bsweebe/Pics/Pickup3.gif

http://webpages.charter.net/bsweebe/Pics/Pickup4.gif

http://webpages.charter.net/bsweebe/Pics/Pickup5.gif

[EternalStrife]

What? And have you ever used any of these before?

[psychofiend]

Those pick-up lines seem like they wouldn't work at all to me. I think that we guys underestimate the intelligence of our female counterparts. And, by the way I think they have no sex drive unlike us guys, who can't control it.

[Zens_7s]

Huh, WRONG-O.

Just wait Psycho. It is a huge myth that woman have less sex drive than men. We just hit it later than guys. This is a very smart evolutionary plan, because if we all hit our peaks at the same time there would be way too much population growth.

I was reading a study the other day that also debunked the theory that woman are more monogamous than men. Instead, it said woman were more likely to seek satisfaction and variety elsewhere, and were also less likely to talk about it. As any detective knows, the only good criminal is the one who never tells anyone what they have done. They don't get caught that way.

[psychofiend]

Ok, fine you are right. Now you can spank me for being so wrong.

[DangerSeeker]

The myth of women not being into sex, but just using it as a reward system for us guys, was a wonderful block to get over. I think the fact that it's something women do grow into is what makes us guys think it's the case, since in high school we're usually the ones focused on it. College, though... eye opening.

Actually, I'd be willing to bet that's a part of why there are so many college lesbians. The sexuality is coming out, but they're at similar paces, while us horndogs are still eager and agressive. They get to learn the joy of foreplay, and who doesn't get sold on sex from foreplay?

[psychofiend]

Either way I will be truthful with you guys, I'm never gunna get laid!!

[EternalStrife]

Sure you will. You just haven't found the right women yet.

[psychofiend]

No, I think I'll just rub it in everyone's face that I'm pure and they're not!!!

[GoreFollower]

You don't understand EternalStrife, he WILL NEVER get laid? (Unless you bag them, kill them, and have fun with them!) /forums/images/icons/grin.gif

[jjcourtright]

Call me crazy, but I would much rather rub, "I had sex last night and you didn't" in somebody's face than "I'm pure and you're not."

[GoreFollower]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
No, I think I'll just rub it in everyone's face that I'm pure and they're not!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

Another quote from the Mysterious/Strange Straight-Edge Steven! /forums/images/icons/shocked.gif

[psychofiend]

I don't know about mysterious, but I certainly am pretty strange. I am a Catholic who listens to an Antichrist Superstar.
http://www.wickedland.com/manson/lyrics/images/antichrist_cover.jpg http://www.ibocce.com/images/pope.gif

[karmattack]

...and Lord knows, Psycho, I'd let you take credit for some of the girls I've slept with.

[pauses to think. Shudders]

Yeah, just let me know and I'll give you those memories free of charge!

(and I'll also be the third to debunk the theory about women having a lower sex drive than men. Furthermore, I'll support the theory that Zens brought up about them being cheats and fibbers. LOL)

[Zens_7s]

Heaven bless you Danger, you have got it figured out. I 195% agree with your assessment of the "experimental" phases of college life and woman kind in general. Good show, you may be the perfect guy like we all suspected!

[GoreFollower]

What the hell is the pope doing? Rolling a ball to a small child so he can build a freindship then sodomize the boy later?

[Zens_7s]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Furthermore, I'll support the theory that Zens brought up about them being cheats and fibbers. LOL

[/ QUOTE ] I may get kicked out of the female tribe for telling their secrets. What will I do? Where will I go?

[Omaru]

emigrate to another city, and live in shame there knowing you've helped liberate mens sexual frustrations by revealing womankind secrets to us improving our chances of layability.

[Zens_7s]

Good point. Oh well, I always liked hanging out with guys so I will survive after my banishment. It's more fun to go out drinking than going on a spa-day anyway.

[EternalStrife]

[Bow's down at Zen's feet]

Where have you been hiding my whole life?

[Zens_7s]

Not in the Day-Spa. I have been hiding in the midwest?

[EternalStrife]

Ah damn. I've been here in the eeeeeaaasssstttttt...............

[Zens_7s]

The East, see that's what was wrong. There is nothing good in the East to see. Maybe some old buildings.

[EternalStrife]

Nevermind that. Next year, I'm moving to the midwest.

[Matthew]

I am in the midwest too.

[code6enterprises]

Me too. Wait what are we talking about?

[Zens_7s]

He was talking about where I have been hiding. Not that I was actually hiding. I think I am usually pretty out in the open.

I like your new avatar Code6. It goes right along with my spikey black haired guy obsession. But it's your avatar, and now I feel wierd.

[EternalStrife]

Reminds me of someone......but I just can't remember who.

[Zens_7s]

It looks a little like Dave Navarro.

[code6enterprises]

I just thought it looked cool.

[EternalStrife]

Does look cool. Where did you find it?

[code6enterprises]

gamespy.com/avatars (http://www.gamespy.com/avatars/)

[DangerSeeker]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Good show, you may be the perfect guy like we all suspected!

[/ QUOTE ] Now if I could only get over that whole stumbling block and use my powers for evil rather than good, my life would be filled with farcical explinations of multiple girlfriends, why people are hiding where, and how I'm always broke and in a hurry to get somewhere.

You know, I think I'll stay good. Evil is too much work.

[Zens_7s]

Well, if life works like it usually does, all the woman will discover your goodness all at once. Then you will end up having to choose between too many. Things never work out quite as planned.

[DangerSeeker]

I can't wait! Actually, I'm physically incapable of waiting, so I just distract myself.

[karmattack]

See, I'm impatient too, but I only seem to distract myself at night, right before bed.

[DangerSeeker]

A KaZaA search: the pick up line that never fails...

[EternalStrife]

What kind of search are you talking about? I only search for mp3's, movies and uh...uh....nevermind.

[JK]

Some desperate loser is lurking around in this thread, at 8:20 in the morning, looking up pick-up lines?


How fucking sad is that...

[By-tor]

This is for the ladies....



http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a150/tuesdayweld/matthewm--woodersonpinkpants.jpg (http://photobucket.com/)

..it'd be alot cooler if you did.

[Psyche]

This is for the ladies....



http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a150/tuesdayweld/matthewm--woodersonpinkpants.jpg (http://photobucket.com/)

..it'd be alot cooler if you did.


that is scary. and ugly.